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about 1000 days of daring greatly

"1000 days of Daring Greatly" is a personal project by Yummii

The project is based on the book; "Daring Greatly" by Brene Brown

For 1000 days, Yummii has set out to take action and be in the arena of her life. She is to discover the realm of Daring Greatly.

Her journey is about discovering courage, vulnerability, and ultimately, mastering the art of living wholeheartedly - and being wholehearted.

Entries in Sonder (1)

Saturday
May062017

Day 295: Daring to change the way I see things

"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." - Dr Wayne Dyer

The above quote from Dr Wayne Dyer reminds me that there is no absolute reality - and that we have the power to change our perceptions so that it can empower us.

At times, this can be challenging. It is much more comfortable to hold onto an existing thought than be willing to get interested in another point of view. To let go of what we hold as "the truth" is to allow ourselves to be vulnerable. 

However, the better we practice empathy, the more curious we get on taking on another's reality, the more wholehearted our relationships will be. 

According to the Dictionary of Obsure Sorrows; "Sonder" captures this experience of reality, thoughts, and perceptions beautifully. 

Sonder;-
You are the main character—the protagonist—the star at the center of your own unfolding story. You're surrounded by your supporting cast: friends and family hanging in your immediate orbit. Scattered a little further out, a network of acquaintances who drift in and out of contact over the years.
But there in the background, faint and out of focus, are the extras.The random passersby. Each living a life as vivid and complex as your own. 
They carry on invisibly around you, bearing the accumulated weight of their own ambitions, friends, routines, mistakes, worries, triumphs and inherited craziness.
When your life moves on to the next scene, theirs flickers in place, wrapped in a cloud of backstory and inside jokes and characters strung together with countless other stories you'll never be able to see. That you'll never know exists. 
In which you might appear only once. As an extra sipping coffee in the background. As a blur of traffic passing on the highway. As a lighted window at dusk."

We are the protagonist of our own story and at the same time, we are the supporting characters and extra's in another.

This context reminds us that everyone's reality is validated... and that they are doing the best with what they know. That we are doing the best with what we know.

In living wholeheartedly; we are mindful and gracious to everyone's journey. 

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In a conversation with a close friend, I shared about a challenging relationship that I was facing. The ego in me was probably looking for agreement and support to build on my case; and I'm sure I wanted to be "right". 

My heart knew that there is more to the story - my mind, well it wanted to be safe, to be right, and to disconnect. 

My wise friend asked me the questions that mattered; the questions that got me thinking from the other's perspective; the questions that forced me to dig deep and do my best to be in the other person's position.

It was uncomfortable - Uncomfortable because I had to let go of the attachment to my truth and create the space in my mind that there may be another version of reality which holds the same validity.

However, in creating the space for understanding, there is an opportunity for healing, for connection, and for bridging the gap.

I truly believe that every human being wants to give love, be loved, and feel connected. We all want the same thing.

And there are barriers to our expression - Inherited realities; misfortunes that left has battered and bruised; or a sense of loneliness that we just can't seem to overcome. We all have a set of beliefs that can empower or hinder us in our choices and actions.

The conversation was humbling. Just when I thought maybe I'm getting the hang of this "wholehearted" living; it reminded me that it is a journey. I'm still learning. 

In order to master what it takes to live a wholehearted life, one must be willing to confront all that conflicts with our heart, all that dampens our spirit, and all that weakens our soul.